TAPAS
“Tapas has the sense of ‘cooking’ ourselves in the fire of discipline to transform ourselves into something else. It is our determined effort to become someone of character and strength. Much like cooking an egg denatures the egg, changing it into a different structure, Tapas eventually changes our nature, turning us into a cauldron that can withstand any of life’s challenges. Tapas is the day to day choice to burn non-supportive habits of the body and mind, choosing to forsake momentary pleasures for future rewards.” - Deborah Adele, The Yamas & Niyamas
Existence is about transformation. We are transforming from the minute we are born until the day our physical bodies cease to exist. We see transformations happening all around us; water turning into waves cresting & crashing, landscapes changing with the seasons, plants, rocks, minerals, animals everywhere growing, deteriorating, changing color, cracking, shrinking, birthing, eating and being eaten…it truly never ends. We accept transformation as part of the price of being alive, of being born into the arms of Mother Nature. The feeling of a beautiful day coming to an end and transforming into night, and all we can do is shrug our shoulders as to say, “well, what are ya gonna do?’
In the big picture of ever-changing life that we watch like a movie where we think know the ending, there is a secret: we have the power to transform, too, on our own terms. Any time we make a decision or set a goal, we are inviting tapas into our lives. Tapas, as Deborah Adele describes as a transformative fire, sounds big and dramatic, but a fire can grow with just a little spark. One small choice, repeating one teeny tiny mindful action over and over again, can create a habit, which eventually will require no thought at all: it becomes part of who you are. Fueled by the momentum of tapas, we can propel ourselves into a new mindset or perspective; a different state of being.
Thinking about tapas in terms of our yoga practice, that fire can guide is through the eight limbs of yoga and beyond. Committing yourself to your practice only requires a small decision to stoke the flame. Years ago, working two jobs, I would often get home just before midnight. I had started exploring yoga videos on YouTube, and decided that 4 times I week, I would complete at least 15 minutes of a video before I went to bed. Sometimes I would stick around for more, other times I would be checking to see if the 15 minutes were up. Adding up to just an hour a week, over time I began to feel a connection to my breath. I soon realized that I could connect to my breath outside of my living room, even without the GOAT Adriene guiding me. That miniscule little lit match inside of me remained over the years, as I explored different yoga variations and group fitness. Eventually that fire led me to Wonderland and TCY, propelling me into a yoga teacher training a year and a half later. A story for another time.
Whenever I am in a class, or practicing on my own, I always set the intention to move slowly and not to rush through asana. This creates literal heat in the body and I feel grateful for that physical reminder of tapas. Yoga has made me strong. Feeling my muscles shake and the sweat on my skin fuels me to continue strengthening the connection to my breath, body, and spirit.
What does tapas look like to you? What is the shape, the scent, the color of your fire?
